If you thought the late night Hook Up app that displays all of the DTF members in your community was enough to satisfy those with the most carnal primordial desires, meet Bang with Friends.
Have a secret Facebook crush? Drunk, and without standards? You know the hottie in the back of your Bio class that you swear has been eyeing you? It’s time to see if she wants to get down with the get down.
No more guesswork. No more late night drunk texting that only results in rejection, which of course causes tears, which in turn forces one to masturbate with said tears for lubrication. This app lets you see which Facebook friends of yours, if any, would actually engage in an act of coitus with you.
The great part about this app: your picks are private. You can keep your self-esteem, because in here, nobody gets rejected. Only reciprocated picks are exposed to one another. You know what this means? no more awkward strolls down the empty hallway staring at your feet while you pass your attempt from last night.
The age old myth that men are much hornier than women, has hopefully all but died by now. Women want wiener as much as guys as willing to slang it. They’re just more discreet. This is great for guys, as it means its not just some huge sausagefest of desperate guys. It’s a tool to cut out the formalities and get straight to work.
The holy grail of sex has arrived. Move, Barack Obama, get out the way. I predict that the founders of this app will unanimously win the Nobel Peace Prize next year. Sure, the odds are around a million-to-one, but who doesn’t like an underdog?